I think know my dad is in denial. He says mom mother wasn’t a hoarder.

My memories say differently. I remember not being able to walk thru the house. I remember dishes stacked three feet high. I remember so much trash in the kitchen I couldn’t walk thru there.

But…

It was a churning mess. At one time, there maybe crap piled four feet high, and another time, one foot high was all the mess ever got. I think if ever left on her own, it would have been piled high, very high. So when my dad says something like that, that she wasn’t a hoarder, it makes me question myself.

I am going thru old pictures to see if I can find any where the crap is bursting. Over the years I threw a lot of pictures away so my husband would never run across them.

Food on the other hand, there is no doubt in my mind she hoarded food. The woman would chew your hand off if you came near anything she was eating. Her eating habits where horrible. Mine are horrible. I realized this weekend and after being back at home that not only did I not learn to clean from her, I didn’t learn the proper way to eat.

I can clean now, but I could still stand to learn more and better ways to clean. Now I must re-learn other things.